I’ll be really honest. I’m not assuming that anyone finds my life remotely interesting, but I enjoy blogging, so I thought I’d yack away anyway. Today’s been one of those day’s I’ve tried to make sense of everything around me.

I got up, showered, walked my dog, sent my details into a promotional agency in the hope of some promo work, I baked some biscuits, I ate about 45% of those biscuits and googled my life away. I’ve got dates for when I could do my make up exam, that could be in about 2 months, which is a decent amount of time to do all the course work and 10 practice faces.

So, what’s on my mind at the moment? I’m thinking a lot about money right now  (I hate living off of savings, that’s what’s meant for the future no?) And wondering how much longer I can go without earning. I think this must be one of the major downsides of turning your back on the traditional education and work cycle…! I live pretty frugally, but meals out and socialising is starting to make me feel a bit queasy!  I know why I left my last job, I was an Xmas temp with no holiday allowance and I got the opportunity to go be involved in a Breaking into News initiative my Mum made me enter. So leaving the job was a no brainer really -  I just found this – it’s me!  It involved going up to London several times in December to be mentored by some one at ITN.

That’s all over now, it was amazing fun… but my life probably wasn’t going to change drastically by being involved in it. Unless I’m missing some opportunity to cash in!? I love writing and I love current affairs, but somewhere along the line my interest in the cut throat world of Journalism has waned.

I’m not convinced it’s worth me getting another shop/bar/insert part-time/dead-end job here (sorry for those enjoying their retail careers…!) Because I’m never in them for long and they can genuinely get me pretty depressed pretty quickly. The work days are long and dull and your often treated like crap… you are pretty disposable I guess! When I am in work I hate, I begin to slip into a cycle.  I lose drive to get anything else in life done, I just eat a lot and sleep a lot.

I do sometimes feel like I’m balancing this tight rope of keeping sane and healthy and trying to make life work at the same time. Hence my mantra of work you enjoy, I knew it wouldn’t be easy but I still believe it’s worth striving for. I saw on twitter the other day, that often it’s not the problem that’s the problem, it’s the way you see it, so stay positive. I think that’s pretty true. So! I’m okay, I’m pretty sure I’m gonna be okay. We’ll just have to count how many times I freak out between these points! With love :)

 

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